Chapter 187: Wake up dear
( ...continued)
The soft whimpering clawed at Autumn’s chest...faint, like the mewling of a lost soul in distress... yet urgent...reaching out to her...
Her eyes fluttered...Her tears were falling so fast her vision was getting clouded. She couldn’t tell where she was anymore. The space felt fluid...mist curling like smoke around her, whispering half sounds, half noise.
She scrambled on her knees, reaching forward with trembling hands. As her fingers curled around the tiny bundle, the crying ceased. The baby stilled... as if sensing her touch, as if recognizing her. Autumn lifted it closer, bringing its downy head to her chest.
And the scent hit her.
It was kind of familiar.Deeply, achingly familiar.
Her entire body stilled as if some thread in the cosmos had been pulled taut.
The baby nestled into her chest, curling slightly, as though it had always belonged there. A gasp broke from her lips, soft.
But even as she held it... something within her screamed. "This isn’t mine...this isn’t my child... where are my babies? "
Her arms wrapped tighter around the child, but her heart was breaking. She buried her face into the blanket, inhaling again, clinging to it, needing grounding...
"Where are my children?Where are they? They might be crying like this somewhere...as well..."
Her chest caved with a sob. She cradled the baby like it would disappear too, tears slipping down her cheeks as she rocked forward and back.
"I want my babies..." she whispered, voice hoarse. "Please... I want to hold my babies..."
Suddenly, through the fog, a voice broke through...full of panic.
"Autumn! Autumn, wake up!"
The mist quivered.
"Autumn, love, it’s not real... please, wake up..."
She felt hands on her cheeks...strong, trembling, trying to ground her.
"I am here. I am right here. Our babies are fine..." She felt warmth over her womb... "They are right here. I can feel them! They are sleeping, sweetheart! "
The dream snapped like a stretched rubber band.
Autumn’s eyes burst open.
Kieran’s face was hovering over hers.
She blinked at him in confusion...his eyes were wild and drawn. His hands cupped her cheeks, shaking her gently.
"You were howling," he rasped, his voice cracking. "You were screaming in your sleep, Autumn..."
Her heart was still racing. Her arms were empty now, her chest cold where the baby had just been. She gasped and clutched at him, and that’s when she noticed...his cheeks were wet too.
She froze. " You were crying? Why were you crying, Kieran? "
" Because I saw it too... "
"You..." her voice barely worked. "You saw it too?"
He nodded slowly, brushing the damp hair from her forehead. "I did. I felt it."
"How...?"
"The mist...remember?" He murmured, his voice quiet, full of something sad. "I told you it lifts that curse,didn’t I? It helped me feel our bond...feel you...and our little ones... I saw what you saw...all of it...I am sorry,Autumn...I am sorry about everything that you are having to go through..."
She was still shaking. He gently pulled her into a sitting position, pressing her against his chest. One hand rubbed soothing circles on her back. She felt his breath fall on her neck...as though trying to lend her calm by force of will... or maybe trying to calm himself as well.
Autumn clung to his shirt, her voice muffled. "It felt so real. The baby... I knew it wasn’t mine, but it felt like it... It smelled like..."
"I know...it had my scent...," he whispered. "But that’s how the nightmares works. It pulls from our fears...and our truths...from our deepest,darkest corners..."
She went still.
Kieran exhaled, keeping his arms wrapped around her. Then, slowly, he began giving her shoulders a subtle message... her neck... her muscles... it was meant to relax her... but it also seemed like he was preparing her for something bigger...
"There’s something I need to tell you, Autumn. Something... about our bloodline...the Blackmoon bloodline."
She lifted her head and turned around slowly, eyes still glassy but locked on his.
He took a deep breath. "Our wolves... they weren’t just born blessed by the Moon. They were chosen in a way...anomaly...mutated...whatever you want to call that. Touched. Marked.You have felt it haven’t you? Through our bond? How my wolf reacts to yours and how yours submits to mine? What we have...isn’t common or normal...this gift made our wolves stronger than the rest of the wolves on our lands...but it also made our wolves vulnerable."
She listened, her breath hitching at times but his fingers kneading at her back, helped her relax... even if a little...
"The Blackmoon wolves carry more than strength in their blood. They carry a curse. A ’blessed curse’, as it came to be known in our pack. The more gifted we were, the more the darkness wanted us. And long ago... someone let it in...one of my ancestors to be precise..."
He paused, gaze turning to the mist that still curled gently around them.
"They let the demons feast on what made us special...greedy for more power. But greed never did anybody any good. They invited this evil into our hearts, our minds. And from that moment, the bloodline was changed forever."
Autumn trembled in his arms.
"This wasn’t madness that claimed us...that would have been better actually...," he continued. "It wasn’t some twisted fate. It was evil, hungry...opportunistic...It whispered to our wolves, called to them in sleep and silence. Turned love into rage. Turned pride into obsession. Even in death, our souls could not rest...you have seen it back at the fortress,remember ? Those portraits? They were my ancestors...the real them...not just paintings...the cursed fragments of their souls..."
She swallowed. "Cursed fragments?In those paintings? "
" Yes... that’s how my father trapped them... "
He closed his eyes for a second before continuing to explain in detail...
"To stop this chain of never ending evil... My father built that fortress...it was like a containment chamber. It wasn’t just to trap the demons targeting us...it was to bind our spirits when we were most vulnerable...Or contaminated with the inflictions...To keep us from losing ourselves...Or hurting our loved ones...You remember how I had reacted when you scraped your skin and your blood soaked one of the posters? "
Autumn stared at him, her voice cracking as she nodded. " Yes. I was very upset with you...because you never explained...you never told me anything...just ordered me around...."
He nodded. "I am sorry, Autumn...I know now how wrong I was...I should have told you everything from the start...but I thought I was doing enough...you see, I was brought up to trust nobody but myself...But I have no shame admitting...I was wrong..."
A long silence stretched between them. Then, softly, he said the words that made her heart seize.
"Autumn... I think this evil... it’s after not only you...and me...but our babies."
Her breath hitched violently.
"I won’t let it take you," he whispered fiercely, forehead resting against hers. "I swear to the Moon, Autumn... I will never let it take you or the little lives growing in there..." He touched her womb, gently... " And I think I might soon have no other option left but to unbind your powers, to protect our babies... "