Gu Xiyan listened to Mu Jinyu's drunken humming of the song and felt a pang of sorrow and sympathy.
"Sigh."
Gazing tenderly at Mu Jinyu, who was lying on the couch, Gu Xiyan heaved a deep sigh and then got up to go back to the room to fetch a blanket to cover him first, waiting for Wen Rou to return so they could carry him into the room together.
"Mom, don't leave... Don't abandon me!"
Just as Gu Xiyan was about to stand up, the drunk Mu Jinyu seemed to sense her movement and suddenly called out in a hoarse voice, stretching out his hand and clutching her arm tightly.
When Gu Xiyan heard Mu Jinyu's hoarse shout, her heart clenched tightly, and she turned her head back to look at him, only to find his head slightly lifted, tugging at her, with drunken, blurry eyes, already streaming with tears.
Seeing Mu Jinyu in such a distressed state made Gu Xiyan's heart tremble violently.
In a daze, she felt as if she could see, back when he was a child, the utter despair he felt after learning that Su Zijin had left.
Especially a year later, when his father also passed away in melancholy, he must have missed his mother even more, hoping she would come back to take him away. Yet, days and years passed by.
In the end, his wish was not granted, and he received no more news about his mother.
Originally, he should have assumed his mother was long dead, but today, he suddenly learned that Su Zijin was still alive, yet she had come back to disrupt his life.
Mu Jinyu held onto Gu Xiyan's hand for quite a while, then laughed weakly a few times and let go, continuing to lie on the sofa, falling into a deep sleep.
Gu Xiyan looked down at her arm—where her originally soft, jade-like arm now had many bruises—showing how forcefully Mu Jinyu had grabbed her!
After a long silence, Gu Xiyan sighed deeply, then took a few tissues to wipe Mu Jinyu's tears. Only then did she go back to her room to fetch a blanket for him and covered him with it.
Afterward, Gu Xiyan thought to check whether Su Zijin had left and went to open the door.
After opening the door.
Indeed, Su Zijin, wearing thin clothes, was still standing at the door.
Gu Xiyan looked at her with complex eyes and said, "Jinyu is drunk. Do you know what he said when he was drunk?"
Su Zijin showed a guilty expression, shook her head slightly, and asked with concern, "What did he say?"
Gu Xiyan then repeated the sentence Mu Jinyu had shouted with all his might.
Upon hearing this, Su Zijin's expression immediately became more complex, and her eyes reddened, with sparkling tears beginning to swirl.
"It's my fault, I didn't fulfill my responsibilities as a mother..."
Gu Xiyan's expression was placid, even somewhat indifferent, as she said, "When he was drunk just now, he also hummed a tune."
As she spoke, she tried to hum the song "Calling My Name", but because she didn't know the Minnan dialect, she hummed it a little off-key and with unclear enunciation.
However, Su Zijin recognized the song she was trying to sing, and immediately, her tears surged forth, sobbing uncontrollably!
"Calling My Name, I will use a lifetime to think and listen,
Once a young man unacquainted, you did not know, you were my life
Calling My Name, Ruan, you need someone to keep you company
On the journey of life, Ruan loves having you lead the way...
With tears in her voice, Su Zijin sang, and the scenes from the past flooded her mind.
Back then, she knew that for the safety of Mu Jinyu and his father, she was doomed to leave them, and her heart was full of conflict and pain. Often, she would sing this song in front of Mu Jinyu.
It turned out that Mu Jinyu had always remembered it!
Su Zijin could imagine the scene: not long after she left, Mu Jinyu's father passed away, leaving him an orphan, squatting by the roadside, watching other families happily together, while he could only look on with envy, and yearning for her to return, to keep him company and hold his hand.
"I'm sorry, wuu wuu wuu, I'm sorry..."
Su Zijin, covering her mouth, wanted to rush in and explain the reasons from the past to Mu Jinyu, but Gu Xiyan stopped her.
Gu Xiyan, looking at the suddenly collapsing and crying Su Zijin, also felt somewhat at a loss, but she knew that letting her go in now would not wake Mu Jinyu and would be meaningless.
At the same time, because of her sudden return today, the resentments that Mu Jinyu had been harboring for years were bursting forth, and if not allowed to vent, it could lead to trouble!
Therefore, Gu Xiyan had to stop her and prevent her from further provoking Mu Jinyu.
Su Zijin, blocked by Gu Xiyan from entering, was feeling an intense urgency. Without thinking, she tried to use force to push her away, but then she remembered that this woman was her daughter-in-law and quickly retracted her hands.
The abrupt withdrawal made Su Zijin's qi-blood flow in reverse, almost causing her to spit out blood, but she forced it back down.
In her heart, she was relieved that she hadn't touched Gu Xiyan; otherwise, there really would have been no chance for reconciliation with Mu Jinyu.
After stopping herself, Su Zijin looked at Gu Xiyan with pleading eyes and begged, "Let me go in, please. I need to explain things to him..."
Gu Xiyan shook her head and said, "Let's go outside to talk. You tell me first, and I will find an opportunity to explain for you."
Su Zijin peeked into the room but couldn't see Mu Jinyu, felt disheartened, and then calmed herself down, sighing, "Alright, let's go outside to talk then."
Gu Xiyan walked out the door, closed it, and then left the building with Su Zijin. They went to a park in the residential area and sat down in a secluded pavilion.
"I know that Jinyu actually still cares about you, but he just can't forgive you for abandoning him back then. Maybe he also knows there were unspeakable reasons that compelled you to leave, but the resentment makes it impossible for him to forgive you..." Gu Xiyan slowly said as she sat down on a stone bench inside the pavilion.
With a pale face, Su Zijin gave a slight nod and said, "I know I wronged him; I was really not a qualified wife or mother. To have left Jinyu for so long without any contact, I don't have the face to see him. But if I don't come back to find him, the torment in my heart makes it hard for me to breathe. I want to make it up to him..."
"Why did you have to leave them, father and son, all those years ago?" Gu Xiyan asked, curious.
Upon hearing this, Su Zijin clenched her fists so tightly that her knuckles turned white. She took a deep breath and revealed her long-kept secret to Gu Xiyan.
She told Gu Xiyan that she was the daughter of a prominent family, where her marital fate was not her own to decide. After learning about the man she was arranged to marry, knowing his character and how he treated women, she was extremely repulsed and insisted she didn't want to marry him!
But breaking off an engagement was not so easy. So, when she went out traveling to clear her mind, she met the father of Mu Jinyu. Attracted to him for some reason, she fell in love fast and subsequently had Mu Jinyu.
But such a thing was not easy to keep from her family, given its great power. Her father, in a thunderous rage, eventually helped her hide the truth. After all, he was the one who adored her the most.
But there are some things in life that are beyond one's control...