But it was different now, with Xu Jiayi sitting on the sofa, eyes closed, looking utterly exhausted.
"You've been sitting here all night?" Shi Xinxin asked.
Only then did Xu Jiayi open his eyes and turn to look at Shi Xinxin. "If I told you I was foolish enough to stay here with you all night, would you feel heartbroken?"
These were not words Xu Jiayi would ever utter. Hearing him say this, Shi Xinxin was taken aback, standing frozen, unsure how to respond.
Xu Jiayi smiled slightly and sighed at Shi Xinxin. "Never mind, I think I understand your heart. But there are many things I still don't understand. Shi Xinxin, can we talk properly?"
Shi Xinxin walked past the sofa where Xu Jiayi was sitting and poured herself a glass of water. "What is there to talk about? I've already refused you. Xu Jiayi, I know you're a good person, a very good person. But my heart truly doesn't hold you. I'm sorry."
"So the person you're still holding onto in your heart is still Sheng Chenjin?" Xu Jiayi mercilessly exposed Shi Xinxin's inner thoughts.
Shi Xinxin paused, then nodded. "Yes. In my heart, I've always thought of Sheng Chenjin, and it has never changed."
"Is it still the same now?" Xu Jiayi pressed on. "Didn't you say the purpose of your trip to America this time was to forget Sheng Chenjin? Yet here you are, using this as an excuse to reminisce about him and your past relationship."
"Yes!" Shi Xinxin took a sip of water, as if preparing for a serious conversation with Xu Jiayi. "I admit I can't forget Sheng Chenjin, but I'm really trying, trying so hard to forget him. But no matter how hard I try to forget Sheng Chenjin, memories of our past always come to mind. Xu Jiayi, I truly can't forget. If I could forget, I wouldn't have gone to the bar to drink."
Her eyes welled up with tears as she spoke. "Do you know, Xu Jiayi? Do you know the pain of wanting to forget someone but being unable to?"
Xu Jiayi watched Shi Xinxin, tears streaming down her face, her eyes filled with despair, while his own heart was also in turmoil.
He didn't answer her, letting her vent all her emotions.
Shi Xinxin continued, "I swear I truly wanted to forget Sheng Chenjin, but I didn't realize forgetting someone could be so difficult. My life is already a mess, yet I still can't forget him. He's like something carved into my bones, impossible to remove."
"Then let me accompany you? Shi Xinxin, just let me stay by your side, okay?" Xu Jiayi pleaded. "Let me be with you from day to night. As long as I'm with you, we can do it, we can definitely forget Sheng Chenjin."
But Shi Xinxin shook her head. "No, I don't want to keep taking advantage of you anymore, Xu Jiayi. You deserve better. You should have your own life, not always revolve around me. That makes me feel even worse."
"But I'm willing. This has nothing to do with you; I'm doing it of my own accord," Xu Jiayi earnestly expressed his feelings to Shi Xinxin.
However, Shi Xinxin still couldn't accept it. In fact, Shi Xinxin knew very well in her heart that she had no intention of forgetting Sheng Chenjin.
And Xu Jiayi sensed this from Shi Xinxin's shaking head and rejection. "Actually, Shi Xinxin, you're not unable to forget Sheng Chenjin; you simply don't *want* to forget him, right?"
Xu Jiayi's words hit Shi Xinxin's heart directly. This was the true thought within Shi Xinxin's heart.
At that moment, Shi Xinxin froze. And this very reaction made Xu Jiayi realize that this was Shi Xinxin's genuine feeling.
Shi Xinxin fell silent, and Xu Jiayi also fell silent. For a moment, neither of them uttered a word.
After an unknown period, Shi Xinxin finally admitted her true feelings. "You're right, Xu Jiayi. I still miss him; I still think of Sheng Chenjin. I've never been able to forget him, and I don't want to forget him. The reason I'm so in pain is because we separated, because of his heartlessness, because he..."
Watching Shi Xinxin's pained expression, Xu Jiayi finally understood.
In this lifetime, Shi Xinxin's heart had always belonged to Sheng Chenjin. It was unlikely she could ever make room for another man.
Xu Jiayi gave a bitter smile. "Shi Xinxin, I understand. It seems I'm the one who should be getting drunk."
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Shi Xinxin said, lowering her head, tears continuously falling.
At this moment, besides her lingering affection and inability to forget Sheng Chenjin, Shi Xinxin also felt immense apology towards Xu Jiayi.
"I know, Xu Jiayi, you've always been by my side, accompanying me, caring for me. But I... I'm sorry, my heart can no longer hold anyone else."
Shi Xinxin kept apologizing to Xu Jiayi.
Xu Jiayi could only smile and shake his head, unable to utter a single word. He wanted to say "You don't need to apologize," but he was too heartbroken to say anything.
"Actually, it's me who's been clinging to you, hoping that one day you'd be moved by me, forget Sheng Chenjin, realize my good qualities, and accept me," Xu Jiayi finally said after composing himself.
Shi Xinxin kept her head bowed, still not daring to look at Xu Jiayi, because facing him at this moment was also a torment to her heart.
Xu Jiayi finally reached out and pulled Shi Xinxin into his embrace.
At this moment, both were grieving for their own love.
Xu Jiayi's gentle words echoed above Shi Xinxin's head. "Shi Xinxin, don't feel sorry. I'm willing to do all of this. In fact, I'm happy. In this true and false entertainment industry, only my feelings for you are real. You're the one who made me feel and experience reality, and for that, I'm already very happy."
Shi Xinxin was now sobbing uncontrollably, torn between her apology and guilt towards Xu Jiayi, and the pain of unrequited love.
Xu Jiayi held Shi Xinxin tightly. "I will help you, Shi Xinxin. I love you, so I want you to be happy. I can let go and fulfill your wish."
Xu Jiayi, after learning Shi Xinxin's true feelings, was shocked, hurt, and saddened. But in the end, he decided to help Shi Xinxin because he loved her and couldn't bear to see her in such agony.
"But, Shi Xinxin," Xu Jiayi proposed a condition. "If within a week, you can adjust to your best state, becoming the vibrant, cheerful, and life-loving person you once were, I promise I will leave immediately and won't continue to stay in this place."