Chapter 185: REFLECTING ON THE DAY’S EVENTS
HANEUL stepped out of his cabin’s small bathroom and sat on the edge of his bed. He picked up his hair dryer, switched it on, and began drying his damp hair. As the warm air blew through his strands, his mind drifted back to all the events that had unfolded today.
Thinking back to Taeyang’s confession made his face grow warm again. Now that he was back on the ship, the reality of what had occurred finally settled over him. He asked himself once more, did that really happen? No matter how strange his life had become, he never imagined that Jung Taeyang would confess to him one day. How could he have? That was Taeyang. The Jung Taeyang. And he was just... well, he was just Haneul.
It wasn’t that he was putting himself down, but the memory of how different their lives had been in his previous world still influenced him. They were like night and day. Taeyang had lived out his dreams, while Haneul’s own life never really went anywhere. It was just a repetitive cycle of work, sleep, and more work. It never truly felt like living at all.
To him, Taeyang had always been like a distant star, someone he could only look up to but never actually touch. That was how far apart their worlds had been. But now, in this new life, it felt like the other was standing within arm’s reach. The distance that once felt impossible to cross had somehow shrunk, leaving Haneul both hopeful and confused.
And now, Taeyang had actually confessed to him. The whole situation felt completely unreal.
In fact, after their conversation ended, and they went their separate ways, Haneul had been completely distracted. He couldn’t focus, eventually stopping swimming and just staying in the tent. Even when they’re eating, there were moments when he found himself just staring at his food instead of eating. It was a real shame too, because the barbecue looked absolutely delicious.
Robin asked him several times if he was alright. He really wanted to tell his friend what had happened and ask for advice, but cameras were everywhere. There was no guarantee their conversation wouldn’t be recorded. It already felt like a small miracle that he and Taeyang even managed to have that conversation at all. Unless he dragged Robin into a bathroom, it would be difficult to share the story.
Speaking of which, when he and Taeyang parted ways, Haneul had left first to avoid looking like they had been together. But even then, he noticed Park Mirae throwing him dirty looks whenever the cameras were turned away or when he thought no one was watching. Haneul couldn’t help but wonder if the other somehow knew about their private conversation. It made sense, since Park Mirae had been searching for Taeyang right before they talked.
Haneul wondered if Park Mirae had actually overheard his conversation with Taeyang, or if he only suspected they had been in the same area. He hoped it was the latter. Because if Park Mirae had heard everything, and considering how he seemed to have plans involving Taeyang, then he would definitely become even more of a pain in the ass.
It was probably for the best that he and Taeyang had chosen not to interact much at the beach. That way, fewer people would suspect they had been missing together. This was mainly concerning Park Mirae, since he was the most likely person to have noticed them near the rock formations. It wasn’t that Haneul feared what Park Mirae might do. He simply wanted to avoid the extra headache of dealing with him.
He shook his head and switched off the hair dryer, placing it back on the bedside table. He then reached for the main light switch by the door and turned it off, darkening the room before lying down on his bed.
He lay in the darkness, staring up at the ceiling, and let his mind drift back to what had happened when they returned to the ship.
They had already eaten dinner at the beach, so the only thing left to do was return to their cabins. Most contestants did exactly that. Even Haneul and Haru, who usually practiced at night, decided to skip it. This was mostly because Haru felt completely worn out from all the swimming.
As Haneul stepped inside the ship, Taeyang suddenly appeared beside him, matching his pace seamlessly. He wished him goodnight with a small but genuine smile that softened his usually sharp features and made his gray eyes look warmer than usual.
Remembering that smile made Haneul’s own lips curve upward. That simple goodnight and small smile made Taeyang’s confession feel completely real. He lifted a hand to his chest and felt the quick, steady beat of his heart beneath his palm.
He wasn’t certain what the future held for either of them, or whether anything would develop from the feelings they currently shared. But he decided to take things slowly, one day at a time. Both of them needed to focus on the competition first. And just as he had told Taeyang, once the program ended, he would give him his answer then.
Hopefully, by that time, he would understand his own feelings more clearly. And if they were both fortunate, maybe they could even debut together.
And with that final thought, Haneul fell asleep with a smile still resting on his face.
***
The next morning, Haneul woke up at his usual time. He completed his regular morning exercises, then brushed his teeth, washed his face, and went through his skincare routine. After changing into fresh clothes, he stepped out of his cabin.
He walked to Haru’s cabin door and knocked to invite him for breakfast. After several minutes with no answer, he stopped. Either Haru was already in the dining hall or he was still asleep. Haneul had a strong feeling it was the latter.
He smiled to himself and headed toward the dining hall. Just as he stepped out of the corridor, a familiar voice spoke, making him jump slightly.
"Good morning, Haneul."